Jazz Marie

iPower Richmond’s radio personality, Brittany “BLU” Uzzell, on overcoming hardships and landing her dream job

July 6, 2018July 6, 2018by Jazz MarieLeave a Comment

Brittany Uzzell aka “BLU”, 29, always had a passion for two things: tennis and music. Uzzell loved both equally but had no clue that one of her interests would end up being her career.

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After graduating from Colonial Heights High School in Colonial Heights, Virginia in 2007, Uzzell faced a multitude of hardships. From being arrested to her grandma becoming ill, it was some of the darkest days in Blu’s life.

But it was a conversation with her grandmother, that gave Uzzell a different outlook on life. “I was ready to give up on myself,” said the iPower 92.1 host. “Before my grandmother passed, she told me ‘you have to find something to live for, you gotta find a purpose.’”

After a rough stint at Richard Bland College, Blu volleyed her way into a full scholarship at Virginia State University where she played singles and doubles on the women’s tennis team.

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Uzzell was always an amazing tennis player, she began playing competitively at the age of eight, garnering many accolades throughout her career. She was named the top player in the Central District of Virginia each year in high school and ranked in the top 10 Junior USTA players in the Mid-Atlantic Region.

During her time at VSU, she discovered the school had a radio station and in 2014, she began her career as an on-air personality. After graduating in that same year, she was hired as a media specialist and also continued to work for WVST.

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Interview with Dave East. || The Source 91.3 WVST || 9-18-17

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By 2017, Uzzell was still trying to break into commercial radio and started to feel like she had only taken steps back.

“I was interning at Power 106 and training to become the next Mid-Day personality,” Uzzell explains. “Unfortunately, I lost my house and became homeless and lost my car. It interfered with my internship at the time; I couldn’t get to the radio station and lost everything.”

It made her question if a career in radio was really her calling.

“I was staying with a friend in Petersburg [and] my mom told me: ‘you know you have a degree, if you go into the army, you can go in as an officer,’” Blu said. “It was like damn my mom is giving up [on me]. I lost everything and I’m questioning is this what I’m supposed to be doing.”

While going through another rough patch in her life, Uzzell’s visit to the WVST office left her in tears. Her self-doubt and overwhelming emotions had her at the brink of giving up but a conversation with Jennifer Williamson (WVST’s program director) helped her to stick with her passion.

Williamson’s subtle advice to Uzzell was to take some time and just pray on it. So, she went home and she prayed.

“God, I’m doing everything the right way. I’m living right, I’m trying to do everything the right way. This is what I want to do but if you’re telling me and trying to show me that this isn’t what I’m supposed to do, then I just need a sign.”

“Literally, the next day, Ms.Williamson tells me the program director at iPower [was] coming to VSU,” explains the radio personality. “Couple of weeks later, he came to VSU and he heard my aircheck; he told me to apply and he gave me a job. Now, here I am at iPower.”

”All I needed was a sign, I felt like he waited until I reached that breaking point where I was about to [quit] and he gave me that sign and I’ve been going at it ever since.”

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For the iPower personality, it is deeper than being on-air. She wants to be able to reach out to the younger generation and give back. People love music, so radio was the perfect outlet. Uzzell’s own platform, BLUApollo, a platform for upcoming and independent artists has changed aspiring artists lives for the better.

“Police officers have come up to me and said, ‘Aye, [Brittany], ever since you did BLUApollo, you kept a couple of people off our radar,’” says Uzzell. “People literally have told police officers, ‘Nah I’m not on that sh*t anymore, I’m in the studio.’”

“Its much bigger than just music, It gives people something to look forward to…something to keep going.”

“And that’s the reason I do BLUApollo,” she continues. “[I want to] give [artists] something to live for. They might not be big, they might not be Nicki Minaj, Jay-Z, or Kanye West but to give them that little hope, that’s what I’m here for.”

Brittany Uzzell wants people to remember that no matter what you go through, you can do whatever you want to do. She’s gone through hell and back, never give up.

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Follow Brittany on Instagram and Twitter.

‘Motherhood has embedded me the desire to persevere, it is because of motherhood I have the good fight, failure is not an option, and greatness is more than a dream’ : Melissa Lopez takes us through her motherhood journey

May 14, 2018by Jazz MarieLeave a Comment

Melissa Lopez from the Bronx, NY, is a mother to two beautiful boys and this is what she had to say about the following mother’s day topics:

On what being a mother has taught her:

“Where to begin…for starters motherhood has taught me an abundance of things. It is an interminable journey and one that has its daily life lessons. Although most moms would suggest that motherhood has taught them endless love, patience, and of course nurturing skills, as it does, what is often left out is how one begins to establish resilience. For I, I have a better understanding and acceptance of my body and its purpose.”

I know that there is no pain that I cannot bear.

“The hardest thing any parent has to do is birth their child. Birth them into a world where hate, inequality, and much other harms exist. Birth them from a womb that has shielded and nourished them for so long. But within this release, I have never felt more vitally alive and thoroughly woman. Motherhood has embedded me the desire to persevere, it is because of motherhood I have the good fight, failure is not an option, and greatness is more than a dream.”

On what she loves about being a mother:

“What I love most about being a mother is somewhat difficult to put into words. It is a feeling that cannot really be explained. It is as if you have re-evaluated your life and what you thought was once impossible, is now the easily attainable. When we are young, we do not envision being parents. We wish to be astronauts, teachers, and singers. But having kids makes you realize like wow, “I was born to be his mom”. I was born to raise these little humans and the journey in doing so is filled with so many emotions and moments wrapped up in one big bubble, better yet one little human. I do not live for myself, I live for them. As a person, I have become kinder, easily approachable, empathetic, and greatly educated. In being their mom, they taught me how to be a better me.”

Most challenging moment throughout motherhood:

“It is NOT always rainbows and butterflies. It is poop, pee everywhere, sleep deprivation, anxiety, and the list continues. One of the most challenging things I had to overcome was postpartum depression and the stigma associated with it. Elation, bliss, euphoria, all words associated with a birth of a child. I mean how can one not feel such gratification and kick ass for single handily nurturing and birthing new life. But with this baby high, also came isolation, a lot of it leading to depression. And with this came a series of concerns and questioning of my love for my child.”

What most people fail to realize is that postpartum depression goes beyond the child itself. It is the relinquishing of your sanity and managing your life on someone else’s schedule.

“Postpartum depression does not discriminate. It struck me, and it struck me hard. The constant feeling of fear and failure replayed in my head like a bad song over and over. The fear of not being able to devote time evenly among your children, failing to devote time to your partner, failing to devote the time and dedication to achieve your greatest potential educationally, personally, and in a career sense. But with time, and self-love, the baby blues slowly wore off.”

Advice to new moms

“This journey you will endure, yet exhausting, is exhilarating. Insecurities and uncertainty will come, and they will come by the dozen, but these too shall pass. Remember these are all phases. I know what it is like to have the trepidation of failing, the self-doubt, and the inability to stabilize your emotions. I reassure you, you are not alone. There will be times where you have no control over your mental processes. There will be times when dinner cannot be cooked and laundry just does not get done. You are only human and you are entitled to voice your momentary “I am losing my shit” without judgment. But, there will also be times in which you and you alone are able to make miracles, soothe that aching boo-boo, make that organic baby food, and even have matching under garments.”

Momma I tell you this, do not dare doubt your instincts. Accept your flaws, and love yourself. Because every year, you will be given the best mom award made with dried macaroni noodles and love.

Lauren on being an “all around player” when it comes to balancing motherhood, dreams, and a social life

May 14, 2018May 14, 2018by Jazz MarieLeave a Comment

Lauren was blessed with a beautiful son Lael (Lah- Elle) who is currently going through his triumphant twos (two years old). So far this journey has been very interesting for her. Lael is her first child and she resides in NYC.

“I’m basically a mom living in NYC who’s trying to be an all around player,” says the first time mom. “Meaning I believe I can achieve my dreams, be social, provide, and love while raising a king! Is that so hard? The answer is HECK YEAH!! And that’s okay because nothing good comes easy, at least that’s what I’ve heard.”

This is what Lauren had to say about the following topics:

What being a first time mom has taught her:

“Being a mom has taught me to be more understanding and compassionate. I look at my mom differently now, I understand why she may have been just tired to just do anything, such as work, cook, clean, be a wife, do my thick long hair fit school …. but she always got the job done. Being a mother can be overwhelming. When I see other mothers in public, sometimes I communicate with them by just smiling. It’s kind of like saying “hey, you’re doing a great job” without actually saying it, and other mothers understand it and for the few that don’t they’re probably running on two hours of sleep and I understand that too.”

What she loves about being a mother:

“Wow… what do I love most about being a mother! I find this question funny because mom isn’t just one role or task it’s so many things linked together, it’s like you can’t have one without the other. But if I had to pick one I would say being able to be a kid again!! Duh! Lael and I sing all the children songs I used to sing but now it’s better because I get to remix the beat! Like our ABC’s we’ll sing over different instrumentals thanks to YouTube! Sometimes I stop whatever I’m doing to just dance and play with Lael around the house and make him laugh. It’s a great way to relieve stress, exercise, and teach while creating memories. I’m aware that Lael will go through different stages in his life so I’m trying take advantage of being a cool mom stage before he gets older and wants to just hang out with his friends.”

Most challenging moment in motherhood:

“Trying to grow in my career. I have my M.S. degree in Sports Management and living in NYC, it’s been challenging to get my foot in the door and grow. Before Lael, I was heavily involved in sports and it was a bit easier to take on jobs that I felt was beneficial towards my career. I was blessed with the surprise of Lael and I told myself: “Do I really have to throw all my hard work away?” Very confused about how can I possibly do this mom thing and still work in my field, I just told myself that I will do my best with being a mom and working in sports and to only allow God to close any doors in my path instead of me just closing them myself due to confusion and fear. Sometimes I’m unable to do certain things when it comes to work because I have to attend to Lael. So I know I have to work so much harder and my competition isn’t easy. But instead of trying to accomplish my career dreams for myself, I’m doing it for Lael.”

I may lose sleep, breakout, and my hair may fall out but I know Lael is my biggest fan and his smile keeps me pushing forward. I just need to make sure to fit in a little “me time” where ever I can.

Advice to mothers:

“My advice to new mothers is to just find your own mommy rhythm. Find what works for you and your child/children. Every story of a mother is different and your story will be too because it’s YOUR story. It’s okay to cry it’s okay to be nervous it’s okay to be very sleepy. Just look at your child, you’re amazing in their eyes! So believe that you’re amazing too don’t look at those stretch marks, or saggy boobs (which are beautiful so don’t feel down about that at all) if you have any just look at your child! If he/she is happy, healthy, and has a safe warm place to sleep at night, well guess what you’re pretty dope! You’ve got this!!”

Lauren is also a two time graduate from Virginia State University!

LaToya Shelby touches on the different experiences she’s faced with her two children

May 14, 2018May 14, 2018by Jazz MarieLeave a Comment

LaToya Shelby, 27, is the mother of two: Mikayla, 6, and Malikhi, 2. Here is what she had to say about her motherhood experience:

On what being a mother has taught her and her first experience with Mikayla:

“I don’t mean to sound so cliche but honestly patience and sacrifice. When I found out I was pregnant with my first child in 2011, my first thought was “OMG.” Then it was the waiting game, waiting until the right time to announce it, waiting to find out if the baby was healthy, due date etc. I didn’t know what to expect but somehow I knew I would be up for the challenge and would be able to overcome any obstacle. I had a high risk pregnancies due to my health issues. Imagine it’s your first pregnancy and instead of being excited, and worry free, your waking up everyday hoping that the stress wouldn’t take a toll on you and your child. I had to learn to except the fact that certain people wouldn’t react the same, not everyone expects you to grow from being a child to now being responsible for one. In this is when I had to learn to have patience for my sanity. On top of that I was working full time and took my maternity leave the day before I gave birth. I had a C- section which somehow I caught pneumonia and was hospitalized for three weeks before I decided to sign myself out the hospital to care for my child.”

On being pregnant with Malikhi:

“When I became pregnant with my son, it was different. His father was involved in everything! I knew from the time I peed on the stick that this was my boy and I was done with this journey. I already knew that I had to be patient and although the timing for baby #2 wasn’t in my ideal time frame, it was okay because his father was there and a little too excited. People talk about all the good things that comes with child birth and pregnancy and that is why a lot of females have high expectations when trying to or becoming pregnant. I had no idea that I would catch a pneumonia once again.”

Most challenging moment:

“Battling through postpartum depression with a four year old and a newborn. Although I had a partner, trust me it was tough! I feel like that part of motherhood was a test to me and those close to me, to see who could handle it. I had to learn how to control my emotions while trying to care for my kids.”

Advice to new moms:

“Your kids will always look up to you. Being their parent they see no mistakes. Sometimes it’s okay to need help, to want more and to feel in contempt with yourself. Trust me you’ll go through many emotions but the feeling of knowing you created someone who you want to not only follow your path but exceed expectations.”

When it comes to motherhood, I am learning as I go. Every experience is a lesson.

MOTHER OF TWO, JALEESA, ON BALANCING MOTHERHOOD AND BEING A FULL TIME STUDENT.

May 14, 2018by Jazz MarieLeave a Comment

Jalessa, 25, is the mother of two boys: Pierre, 2, and Preston, who is three months. Outside of her motherly duties, she is also a full-time student at Hunter College. Although she is securing her future, it’s made motherhood a little more difficult.

“The most challenging for me is still being a full time student trying to be flexible with my school load and tending to my two children,” Jaleesa explains. “Having kids back to back was very overwhelming for me but I I’m learning day by day how to push through it. I also have my kids father by my side which is a huge blessing. Some days when he’s at work, and I have to be a full-time mommy and finish my homework and still clean up after them and get them ready for the day, plus attend classes at night, I feel like the world is on my shoulders.”

It really takes a village to raise children and I’m glad I have the family I have to be apart of my village.

On what being a mother has taught her:

“Being a mother has taught me to love myself unconditionally because if I’m unhappy then my children will also be unhappy.I realized after having my first child that everything I do will reflect me as a parent. I also learned that when you have your own, you would do every & anything to protect and nurture them. Being a mother has taught me so many wonderful things, but the best gift is learning how powerful and intellectual I’ve become now that i have children. That’s something that moms should embrace everyday because we pushed out these beautiful little people.”

On what she loves most about being a mother:

“I love watching them grow day by day into the person they was put here set to be. I love that my “little someone” will love me unconditionally and will never judge me. I love that in my little ones eyes I’m their superhero!!! I love that I get to capture these beautiful moments with someone I created.”

Advice to new moms:

This is going to be one HELL of a ride so hold the f*ck on!!! This is not easy believe me, but it’s worth it. Just take in day by day and relax.

It’s okay if you feel overwhelmed, you got this!

“The babies have their own schedule, so you now run on their time now. There is no more YOU for a while until they learn a sleep routine. But make sure you still find time to rest and get “you time” when the baby is resting.”

“There will be tonssssss of SH*TTY diapers, so prepare to learn how to breathe through your mouth and not through your nose, if you want to survive. Also don’t worry the baby is breathing!!! It’s ok… don’t worry …you’re gonna check to make sure the baby is breathing every second of the day. ‘You’ll barely remember to sleep.”

Chantel Williams shares what motherhood is like with her amazing son Zaire

May 14, 2018May 14, 2018by Jazz MarieLeave a Comment

Chantel Williams,31, is a New York City native and two time graduate of Virginia State University. She currently resides and teaches in the DMV with her lovely three year old Zaire. They enjoy traveling and attending outdoor events, reading, working out and learning new languages. Here is what she had to say about the following topics:

On what she loves most about being a mother:

“I absolutely love watching his personality blossom. He’s amazingly bright, loving and perceptive. Right now he’s convinced that he is a lion and that I’m an elephant. If I call him a boy, he’s quick to correct me. I live for the moments when he walks over to hold my face and say “I love you Mama elephant”. Of course five minutes later he’s destroying my living room with his latest block tower architectural project but I love every moment of it. He has his difficult moments like any toddler but Zaire will sit and really reflect on what he did wrong. He apologizes without prompting from anyone. I look at all of his characteristics and quirks and think about the type of man he is going to be. It’s exciting and gives me this passion to make sure I help nurture all of these phenomenal things about him.”

What has being a mother taught you about yourself?

“Gosh…I’ve learned so many things over this 3 year journey. I think one of the most important things I’ve learned about myself is that I have a greater capacity for love than I could have imagined. I honestly never knew I could love another person this much and this purely. I’ve also learned to trust myself. I recall having so much anxiety after I had my son because people around me were making me second guess my decisions. I internalized their criticisms and insecurities which made those first few months extremely difficult. The amount of input was overwhelming from critiques about my decision to breastfeed to preference of daycare facility to choice of discipline. It took a physical and emotional toll but luckily over time I was able to regain confidence in my ability as a mother.”

Most challenging moment throughout motherhood:

“My most challenging moments have probably been finding out about and managing Zaire’s food allergies. We found out that he was allergic to dairy when he was around 7 or 8 months and then earlier this year we discovered he had a life threatening allergy to some nuts. Watching him break out into hives, vomit and his lips swelling was terrifying especially since I didn’t know what caused it. Afterwards, I dealt with feelings of guilt because I gave him something that could have killed him. Granted I didn’t know he was allergic at the time but it was still rough.”

Advice to new moms:

“Don’t be afraid to ask! I give SO much credit to the Facebook groups I joined for breastfeeding, baby wearing, allergies, Black motherhood, crunchy moms etc. These women provided a wealth of information and comfort that I wasn’t able to get from those in my “real life” circles. Know that you are capable even through those stressful moments. Take time for you. You aren’t just a mother, wife, girlfriend, whatever. YOU need time to re-energize and do things that are just for you. Don’t lose your identity. Be flexible and know that you cannot do it all. Some things must wait, and others you delegate. Don’t get caught up trying to be the perfect mom. Some days they will eat fruit snacks and Chic-fil-a nuggets and that’s ok. At the end of the day if they are happy, healthy and alive, you’ve done your job!”

Takiyah Joseph sheds light on her motherhood experience

May 14, 2018May 14, 2018by Jazz MarieLeave a Comment

Takiyah Joseph, 26, is the mother to the happiest 15-month-old, Kelis. She is currently a flight attendant for a major airline. She grew up a first generation American, from a Trinidadian family. She is a self proclaimed carnival chaser “from since small,” and excited to bring her little baby right along with her. Her culture is extremely important to her, and she fully intends on teaching it to her daughter. She’s also looking forward to taking her around the world so she can learn first-hand about other cultures, as well. Here’s what she had to say about Motherhood.

What has being a mother taught you about yourself?

“Being a mother, has taught me to be a different type of woman. One that feels empowered, and really, essential to life. Having a child (raising one, and childbirth) takes strength, both physically and mentally. After giving birth, for mothers like myself that chose to breastfeed, you are your child’s only source of life. All that is you, is now them and you are their only source of nutrition.”

What do you love most about being a mother?

“I love that not only am I teaching a little human being, but that my daughter is teaching me as well. I understand that she looks at life completely different from me, and is so innocent about it. I love that with everyday, it’s something new with her. I love watching how excited and happy she gets about the smallest things, and the amount of love for life I can see in her eyes.”

Most challenging moment throughout your motherhood journey?

“To be completely transparent, I struggled with trying to force my child’s father to be the father that I wanted him to be, and realizing that the plan I had for myself, wasn’t what I’d be living, going forward. I also struggled with two lifestyle changes: becoming a new mom, and becoming a flight attendant. When I first started out in this career, it was a completely different lifestyle. Add in, becoming pregnant, becoming a mother, and becoming a single-mother all at once, and for some, it could be an immediate recipe for disaster.”

Advice to new moms:

“There is no preparation for becoming a mom. I had four months off prior to my child’s birth, and the moment my doctor told me she would induce me three days later, I told her no, because I wasn’t ready. Don’t be afraid to ask for advice, but also, know that it is okay to trust your own motherly instincts. There will be a lot of unsolicited advice from those that do, and do not mean well. It is okay to put your foot down, and stand up to those that raised you, and let them know YOU are your child’s parent.”

Asia Marie Daniels on being diagnosed with PCOS and overcoming the odds of not being able to have children

May 13, 2018May 14, 2018by Jazz MarieLeave a Comment

Asia Marie Daniels, 28, from the Bronx, NY, is the mother to an amazing two-year-old, Adonnis. Motherhood is extra special to Daniels because she faced many challenges prior to the birth of her son. She met her significant other, Angel, at 22 and realized that this was the person that she wanted to settle down with. Two years into their relationship, they started to discuss building a family and went to see a doctor, but the news that followed would have them questioning if their family would ever be complete.

When Daniels was 18, she stopped getting a regular menstruation. At the time, she thought it was awesome but four years later, when she went to the doctor with Angel, she found out that she had Polycystic Ovary Syndrome. According to Women’s health, Polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS), also known as polycystic ovarian syndrome, is a common health problem caused by an imbalance of reproductive hormones. The hormonal imbalance creates problems in the ovaries. The ovaries make the egg that is released each month as part of a healthy menstrual cycle. With PCOS, the egg may not develop as it should or it may not be released during ovulation as it should be. PCOS can cause missed or irregular menstrual periods. Irregular periods can lead to: Infertility (inability to get pregnant) and development of cysts (small fluid-filled sacs) in the ovaries.

“In my case my body produced more testosterone than estrogen and turned my eggs into cyst, explains Daniels. “I was told I’d never be able to have a baby because of this. As a human being, when someone challenges you with something you really want, you challenge them back…at least I did.I tried every ovulating pill, shake, exercise and diet there was. After about a year, we got a positive test but just a couple days later we also had a loss. Naturally, I gave up and focused on school and my career.”

Another year passed and when January came around, Daniels got super sick with the flu and had to be hospitalized. Her doctor at the time –who knew her journey– came running into her room screaming [the test] was positive.

“ I cried five times,” she says. “My first thought was fear because we have been here before, my second thought was: “God, please. I trust you.” My doctor immediately set up appointments to have me and the baby watched closely and warned me that most PCOS patients don’t make it to three months.”

There was a 80% chance of a miscarriage but if she could make it past three months, the odds were the same as a healthier woman. On March 4, 2015, she was officially three months.

I sat down and cried my eyes out thanking God for getting me here and trusting me through this journey.

Although her pregnancy had many challenges including being diagnosed with Diabetes and in labor for about five days, she wouldn’t trade it for the world.

I would repeat every step 1000 times just to meet him again.

The journey to motherhood and being a mom of one has taught Daniel’s many things about herself.

“Being a mom has taught me that I am resilient, I am strong and most of all it taught me to accept weakness,” says the Bronx native. “In the beginning, I would always blame myself for the things I couldn’t do perfectly. I always held my self to a high standard and when I saw other moms doing something effortlessly, like breastfeeding, I would always put myself down and question my strengths as a mom. Since then I’ve learned to accept that there is no such thing as a “perfect mom” we all just have special ways of dealing with mommy obstacles. I still have days where I wonder if I am doing a great job but I don’t beat myself up. I do all that I can for my son and watch him grow.”

Advice to new moms:

“Soak in every moment of pregnancy and beyond,” Daniels says. “The journey is beautiful, I wish I took more pictures of my belly. I didn’t because I developed stretch marks and let that stand in the way. Everyone warned me that years go by like seconds and now I stare at my almost three year old identify colors and shapes and I sometimes cry tears of joy and sadness because time does fly by without notice.”

Don’t ever let anyone tell you right from wrong and no matter what, you are doing the hardest job in the world, take your time, cry, smile and most of all pat yourself on the back mom! You made a baby!!

She also address the “mommy guilt” that many mothers face:

“Take time for yourself, I still struggle with mom guilt if I leave my son longer at daycare or go out to do my nails, But I promise you mom, your baby won’t forget about you. Don’t be afraid to ask for help to sleep a little longer, to have a long calming bath or even to get some air and a coffee, you deserve it and your baby will be just the same when you get back.”

I’m still growing and learning who I want to be in this world but one thing motherhood has done for me is it made me want to change the world, so that my son never has to experience the bad in it. He’s made me more ambitious to be someone who he can be proud of and want to model.

Jenay Scarchilli-Parson on what inspired her to create ‘JP’s Tasties Catering & Event Planning’ and advice to mothers who want to chase their passion.

May 13, 2018May 13, 2018by Jazz MarieLeave a Comment

Poughkeepsie’s finest, Jenay Scarchilli-Parson, 27, is a wife, mother to three beautiful boys: Terrance,7, Dominic 5, and Mason,1, business owner of JP’s Tasties Catering & Event Planning and restaurant manager at Red Lobster. Like many working mothers, she spends a lot of time away from her family due to demanding work hours (50 hours a week and sometimes more). JP’S Tasties Catering & Event Planning was the perfect way for Parson to support her family and follow her passion.

I often feel guilty sometimes because I am away so much so I saw something that I love to do which is baking and cooking and hosting parties as a way to support my family but also do what I love to do on my time.

“I started a catering and event planning business about two years ago, says the entrepreneur. “I feel like it was a really good idea for me as a mother because I saw it as a way out of the usual 9 to 5. I do everything from cupcakes, cakes, brownies, pies, cheesecakes, you name it. If I don’t know how to make it, I will learn how to make it.I usually love those orders because it’s an opportunity for me to gain a new skill.”

Parson has worked in the hospitality sector since she was 14 years old. With so much background experience in the field, it helped her gain the skills she needed to run her own business. She’s been very successful with the catering aspect and is looking forward to more event planning opportunities. She shares what makes her business so unique.

“There aren’t many companies around here that will offer the combination of catering and event planning all in one place,” says Parson. My ultimate dream for my business is to have everything under one building, meaning I would love to have a gorgeous restaurant or bakery where I can serve my desserts and have a another section of my building for events… like a huge event and banquet hall…that way it is truly a one stop shop for everything.”

She continues, “I really would like to go the more modern route with my business. There are other banquet halls or catering services but they are all very formal and there’s nothing wrong with that, but I would love to offer the combination of both.”

“Also, being a Black owned business says a lot in itself. We don’t have many of those around [Poughkeepsie] now a days that are successful and long-lasting. I would love to make it as one of those businesses in my community.”

It’s also a great opportunity to set a wonderful example for other young Black girls and to create jobs in my community.

The business owner also opened opened up about her experience as a mother.

What being a mother has taught her:

“Being a mother has taught me a new level of strength and patience,” says the mother of three. “I’ve learned I can bare more stress and less sleep than I ever thought possible also that I’m a great multitasker”

The most challenging moment as a mother:

“The first couple of months home with my babies, I tried to breastfeed with all three of my children but none of them wanted to latch on to me. I was confined to a breast pump every two hours including through the night. The lack of sleep took such a toll on me . I would also have to say no longer having full control over your life anymore. You now have this little person who gets to control when you eat when you sleep. if you usually have personal time to yourself, it’s a big change to get used to.”

On what she loves most about being a mother:

“What I love most about being a mom is pretty much the motivation that you get from your children to do better for yourself and for them. I love that my kids are so loving and forgiving of me… even [on my] worst days. [Some] days you feel like a total failure as a parent and your kids continue to see you as the best thing in the world. It’s a type of unconditional love like no other.”

I don’t think that I would go half as hard as I do for my business and for work if it wasn’t for my children; and doing it for them to be able to give them the things I didn’t have growing up.

Advice to mothers who want to chase their passion or start a business:

“No one is going to support your dream or feel as passionate about your dream as you do. Do as much research as possible, there are so many grants out there for young Black women trying to start a business. It is also a great way to support your family while creating your own schedule and being your own boss. It also teaches your kids to work for the things that they want in life. It shows them that hard work does pay off and is a great opportunity to create a legacy to leave behind for your children.”

Jenay Scarchilli-Parson had the pleasure of marrying her high-school sweetheart, Terrance Parson, and says he’s been a great supporter and father for her family and in her business.

Cineya Gayle addresses the misconceptions that come with being the mother of a stillborn

May 13, 2018by Jazz Marie1 Comment

Brooklyn native, Cineya Gayle, spent 20+ hours in labor at Piedmont Hospital in Atlanta, Georgia, but already knew her daughter, Kalilah Gayle was gone. Prior to the delivery, Kalilah’s heart stopped beating. Although it was the worst experience of her life, on November 2, 2017, she gained an angel. Gayle is very vocal about the stillbirth on social media and is determined to be an advocate for other mothers who are dealing with a loss and hopes to make the conversations less taboo.

According to CDC, Stillbirth effects about one percent of all pregnancies in the United States and each year about 24,000 babies are stillborn. African-American mothers are twice as likely to give birth to stillborns. In some cases the cause of death is known but in the case of Kalilah Gayle, it was not.

Gayle addresses some of the misconceptions that comes with stillbirth and being the mother of an Angel.

“Oh my god, there are so many,” says Gayle, 24. She starts with the fact that people feel like stillbirth isn’t losing a ‘’real baby.’’

“Sometimes I think people don’t consider her “real” because why wouldn’t I want to talk about her,” says Gayle. “Why wouldn’t I consider myself a mother? What’s really the difference?’’

The NY native continues, “We aren’t sad all the time. I’m happy to be Kalilah’s mom. Mothers want to talk about their children alive or not. We don’t want our child to be forgotten and we don’t want to be ignored or avoided.’’

“The ones closest to me that I expected to support me, they didn’t. I had to deal with my daughters death and the people I love not knowing how to be there for me, or just choosing not to. And that was hard.”

“There is so much family and friends can do to support.” she explains. “It’s better to say “I’m thinking of you and your daughter’’ than nothing at all. [You can] google what to do when someone loses a baby.”

And lastly, “Dads hurt, too.’’

Gayle didn’t think she would find the strength to live without her daughter but each day she continues to thrive. She was broken down, at rock bottom and thought her life was over. She was in the darkness for a longtime and to overcome that, she says is an amazing experience.

“I still can’t believe it. To look back and know that I came through something I would have never imagined gives me hope,” she says. “My daughters death was supposed to break me and it didn’t. I got back up! I am better than I ever was and I could never again doubt my strength.”

“I have to live for my child now, she’s counting on me and cheering me on from heaven.”

Gayle reminds herself daily that Kalilah is still with her and she’ll never forget the 40 weeks they shared together.

‘’Being a mother is a great honor and privilege. God gave us women the gift to bare children and to be eternally connected to a human you created! How amazing motherhood is, to understand what unconditional love really is. A mother means sacrifice, dedication, and hard work!’’

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